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Monday, February 28, 2011

Embrace your weaknesses, Receive His grace

In the song "Beneath the Surface", I've tried to describe the desperation that I've felt in trying to keep "everyone's" approval.  Never letting anyone get too close, so they wouldn't find out who I really am.  If they knew, they wouldn't like me, certainly wouldn't love me.  In fact, they'd judge me.  I see the belly beneath the clothes that hangs.

The voices of the enemy tells me that "I'm lazy."  "I'm worthless."  "I'm not trying hard enough."  "Don't accept defeat." "Work harder."  "Work smarter."

I cannot accept that there is something deficient in me.

And every failure bring another wave of guilt and another layer to hide.  It pushes me deeper underground.   I cannot face the reality...
I fail.
        I'm weak.
                       I'm needy.

I'm desperate for God to fill me.  I cling to His grace, for it fills in the places where I fall short.  He was perfect, because He knew I could never be.  He lived the life I can't and then He gave His life to me as if it were my own.  So His perfection is mine!  It makes NO sense. I still fail--miserably.  My faults are always before me, seeking to re-imprison me inside the walls of guilt and shame.  But love says, "No!

She's forgiven and free!"

I'm learning to live in this reality.  Not letting the eyes of others tell me I'm ok.  Not letting their misinformation tell me how to live.  Looking to Love to show me how to live in this freedom, and desiring to take others there.

How can I embrace my failures, my weaknesses and my struggles?  They're not areas to be hidden, to run from, to surpress...   When I  spend all of my energy hiding, it seems like the forces of darkness expend all of their energy trying to expose them, all the while whispering, "Don't let them find out.  What are they going to think?"  The moment I give up the struggle and announce my struggles, my pains and my problems from the rooftops, I walk in new freedom.  Hell's hold on me is broken.  And in rushes a flood of grace and peace that carries me.

And I'm NOT making excuses!  That lie won't fly anymore!

No more comparing.  I have my own unique path to walk.

I can only do my best, given my circumstances, my strengths, my weaknesses...and even if I'm not doing all I can do...

                                  HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT!!!!!!!!!



embrace your weaknesses
admit your failures
stop trying to earn approval and acceptance
stop trying to prove that you're worthy
stop comparing yourself with others
receive His grace
receive His righteousness
receive His perfection, His wholeness, His sufficiency
receive His love
receive His forgiveness
receive His full acceptance

He gave His life that you might have these extravagent gifts
just open your heart and receive them

From a Recovering Achiever seeking to fully receive the gifts God so generously and lavishly gives

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