Saturday, January 7, 2012

40 Days of Discovery- Day 5

Today's journal excerpt (Jan 6):

Part of the reason I have had the compulsion to "rule keep" is to avoid suffering.  Somehow I think that if I do everything "right", I can avoid  all pain.  Clearly, I have issues!

How do I put no confidence in my efforts, yet work hard as unto the Lord--pouring out my full effort?

Resting in His grace isn't an excuse to be lazy.

Teach me Holy Spirit how to do the work you've called me to do, FULLY trusting you to cause my work to be productive and effective.  Knowing full well that my works will be flawed.

Oh how the Holy Spirit taught me this as I directed for Classical Conversations.  I was aware on so many occasions of my flaws.  So many occasions!  I failed miserably in many areas.  I hurt  people.  I was often back peddling and readjusting, learning, undoing and not being nearly as organized as I needed to be.  I didn't trust others to help me as I should.  I messed up my finances over and over.  And yet I experienced great success overall!  God allowed me to lead flourishing communities.  From the community I directed, 5 new communities were formed, including 6 directors, a state manager, and many tutors whom I was blessed to influence.  Some may say that I was in the right place at the right time.  And I would agree.  I was right where the Father placed me.  I was continually on my knees listening to His voice, that I might obey His every word.

I certainly didn't obey perfectly, yet my heart's desire was to please Him and He honored that.  I was also blessed by the families I served.  Seeing how God accomplished His great and mighty work in and through me is encouraging.

So we can be free to do ALL that God calls us to do, knowing that He is FULLY responsible for the results.  Our job is to fully devote our hearts to Him, and seek to obey Him to the best of our ability

That's the GREAT God I serve.  He takes all that is wicked, evil, depraved, and somehow transforms it so that it produces something beautiful, good and inspiring.

He did that with the cross.

He does that with His people who are being  persecuted.

He's doing it, with me.

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